Good Morning Bravehearts
Well, the terrible events of the summer are behind us and it is safe for me to emerge once more from Cave Freedom.
I have to admit that the sight of my "Scolympians" parading around London with gold medals and Union Jacks draped round their shoulders put me off my porridge for weeks. How dare they betray the Scottish Nation whilst we fight for our freedom. Trust me, that lad Hoy and the grim faced tennis player from Dunblane will both be asked to "get on their bikes" once my tartan army of freedom fighters and gullible dreamers sweep me into office as President of New Caledonia. Cherish the day!
No. Once the glorious day comes there will be no place for fainthearts and traitors (or businessmen according to Big John Swindly). They will be the first to be marched through our brand spanking new border controls. Off to London with the lot of you and take your private sector with you.
Mine will be a land of the brave, the naive and, until we pay off our share of the National Debt, the penniless.
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